Serving 101

When you work in the restaurant industry as long as I have, you pick up a few things. In my case, a lot of things. Granted, it helps that I've worked for some very good chefs and restaurant bigwigs who have an intolerance for imperfection that, though sometimes stressful, creates a beautiful dining experience. Let's just say it rubbed off, and after all these years I will not submit to giving casual (also known as "sloppy") service, even in a casual dining atmosphere. I expect the same out of the person serving me, and was therefore disappointed to hear a colleague voice a bad experience about one of my favorite local spots, due to the server bludgeoning one of the most basic (yet often-broken) laws of serving.

It went like this: while dining with his family, the waitress cleared everyone else's empty plates, leaving my colleague eating alone. And then she asked if anyone was interested in a dessert menu.

The server made two errors in this scenario, and kudos if you caught them both. (If you caught neither then you're about to get schooled, because every good chef and manager I've ever worked under feels the same way.)

Error number one: a table is not to be cleared until all guests have finished eating. It is considered extremely rude to leave one person eating alone, particularly if that person is a woman (feminism might have set chivalry back in the real world, but in restaurants it is very much alive and well). It leads that person to feel rushed, which can ruin an otherwise pleasant dining experience.

There is only one exception to this rule: if a guest hands you their plate or tells you they're done and pushes it at you, you may remove it. To all you diners out there, this is considered rude. We as servers are inwardly rolling our eyes at you. And we're going to immediately tell our manager that you requested we take the plate so we don't get yelled at for breaking the aforementioned rule. Don't leave your dining companions eating alone! It's not going to kill you to look at your empty plate for a few more minutes. You're supposed to be paying attention to your dining companions anyway.

Error number two (and this is a sales person trick, so pay attention): you do not ask patrons if they want to look at a dessert menu. You hand them a dessert menu and tell them you'll come back after they've had a moment to look at it. Someone who does not want dessert will decline immediately, but someone who was perhaps on the fence about dessert can often be swayed once they've looked at the offerings. Not to mention dessert is traditionally a legitimate course, not an afterthought. It should be treated as such.

Exceptions to this rule? Unless the table requests the check prior to your dropping dessert menus, drop the menus.

As the diner, if you're faced with a situation in which you feel the server made a major error, the best thing to do is privately speak to the manager. Most server errors are made out of ignorance, not malice, and the only way to correct them is through education. In my experience both as a patron and as a manager, management is pretty receptive when approached in a calm and respectful manner. And I happen to know first-hand that the manager at this restaurant gets shit done. (If you missed that post, it can be seen here: http://eatingyourinhibitions.blogspot.com/2012/02/happy-valentines-day.html)

Happy 4th of July!